5 Tips for Talking Across Differences and Disagreements

This is the presidential election year when derogatory name-calling sunk to new lows: Donald Trump has called Kamala Harris “Dumb as a rock.” “Mentally disabled.” “DEI hire.” She calls him “weird” and a “disgrace.”

It’s also the election year that viewers of the debate between vice presidential candidates were shocked—in a good way—that the pair was civil, even polite.

No wonder discussing diverse political viewpoints in today’s polarized climate seems so fraught, whether in the classroom or at the dinner table.

The College of Education and the Office of Undergraduate Studies launched the Intergroup Dialogue Training Center in spring 2024 to equip University of Maryland students, faculty and staff with the skills to engage in conversations around complex issues.

Under Co-directors Jazmin Pichardo and Carlton Green, the center’s goal is to foster a culture of meaningful, productive conversations across diverse sociocultural, political and disciplinary perspectives on campus.

“At a fundamental level, we all share a need and desire to belong—to feel that we matter to the communities we are a part of and that the issues that most affect us are worth acknowledging and addressing,” said Pichardo.

To help foster these types of productive conversations in class and elsewhere, Pichardo and Green offer these five tips:

Reframe conversations as opportunities for growth. Often, discussions labeled as “contentious,” “divisive” or “polarizing imply the primary goal is achieving harmony or consensus. That outlook can result in conversations that suppress or diminish dissenting or diverse viewpoints, said Green, who brings a counseling psychology background to his work. Instead, he suggests framing these discussions as “necessary” and “constructive.” This shift in perspective emphasizes fostering community and collaboration rather than seeking agreement.

Create a brave (not just safe) space. Cultivating environments where students feel physically and emotionally secure is essential . Equally important is ensuring that students are comfortable sharing their perspectives. “In brave spaces, students are encouraged to question biases, challenge assumptions and engage in meaningful dialogue,” said Pichardo. “These spaces empower students to take risks, make mistakes and, most importantly, learn from one another.”

Embrace and manage emotions. Fear is powerful and can sometimes play a role in our efforts to face and discuss disagreements. Instead of suppressing emotions, embrace them as important aspects of dialogue that help promote understanding and connection. “Identifying, naming, communicating and responding to one’s own—as well as others’—emotions are skills that help with navigating conflicts and communicating care to others,” said Green.

Lean into “first-draft thinking.” In educational settings, there’s often pressure to demonstrate competence and provide the correct answers. Pichardo and Green challenge that notion: “It’s OK to offer emerging ideas, perspectives or observations, even if they’re still being processed,” said Green. This mindset not only promotes a culture of curiosity and learning but also makes it easier for students to engage with diverse perspectives.

Focus on collaborative solutions. Pichardo recommends encouraging students to identify shared goals and explore how different perspectives can contribute to innovative solutions. “A healthy democracy, or a healthy classroom, relies on the ability of its members to engage in constructive dialogue, even when they disagree,” she said. “Our past is rich with examples of leaders engaging in robust and thoughtful discourse from diverse viewpoints, and it is these very exchanges that continue to shape and sustain a democracy that strives to serve everyone.”