---
title: "Op/ed: 8 Phrases That Signal a Toxic Friendship"
date: 2024-02-23T05:30:00-05:00
author: University of Maryland
canonical_url: "https://today.umd.edu/op-ed-8-phrases-that-signal-a-toxic-friendship"
section: Articles
---
# Op/ed: 8 Phrases That Signal a Toxic Friendship

*February 23, 2024* — by [Marisa G. Franco](/author/marisa-g-franco)


> UMD Psychologist Offers Tips on Knowing When to Move On

*I Stock 1403239673 1920x1080 — A friendship that's turned toxic can have some telltale signs, a UMD psychologist says.*

*Where would we be without friends? But when a relationship with a pal turns toxic, the answer in that case might be, “in a better spot.”*

*In a new column on CNBC.com, assistant clinical professor Marisa G. Franco, an expert in grown-up friendships and author of the recent book “Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make—and Keep—Friends,” explains how to pick up on clues that a friendship has become damaging.*

**1. ‘You’re too sensitive.’** When friends say “you’re too sensitive,” they imply that your feelings aren’t valid and that there’s something wrong with you for having them.

But expressing your emotions is a healthy part of any friendship, and being told you’re too sensitive may indicate your friend lacks empathy.

**2. ‘I was just joking. Can’t you take a joke?’** Good friends are responsive and try to meet your needs. When you tell a friend you’re hurt, responsiveness looks like them trying to understand why and adjusting their behavior.

In a toxic friendship, they may instead say things like “Can’t you take a joke?” as a defense to camouflage hurtful comments and avoid accountability.

*Read the* [*other six tips*](https://www.cnbc.com/2024/02/22/if-your-friends-use-any-of-these-toxic-phrases-it-may-be-time-to-move-on-says-psychologist.html) *on CNBC.com.*




**Topics:** [Research](https://today.umd.edu/tags/research)


**Tags:** [Psychology](https://today.umd.edu/topic/psychology), [Research](https://today.umd.edu/topic/research)


**Units:** [Honors College](https://today.umd.edu/topic/honors-college)